I want to be entertained

I really hate it when friends try and set you up with people without you even knowing it’s going on. I went to a bar last night, looking for a decent night of the usual drunken fun. But my so called friends decided that I am in dire need of a woman. Next thing I know, I am being forced into a conversation with some silly mare that I have nothing in common with. 

I was completely unaware that I was being match made, so carried on with my usual “cram as many beers into my stomach” routine (it’s still £1 pints on Thursday)  and did my best to keep the conversation going. An hour or two later (and about 8 beers) I was steaming drunk and managed to make a bit of a fool of myself. It wasn’t until later that someone told me that we were being set up. Turns out the poor girl was really looking foreword to it and made a bit of an effort to get all made up and everything. I feel bad, but they should have told me what was really going on. I don’t think I’ll hold my breath for a second date.

So as far as I am concerned, leave the UK Dating thing to the professionals. At least then I’d know what’s going on.

A seeing eye dog has been banned from an Indian Restaurant in Kent after it ‘offended the owners’.

Mr Elder-Brown was taking his girlfriend and 5 year old daughter out for a meal when he was told he would have to leave his seeing eye fog tied up outside the restaurant. Mr Elder-Brown showed his card to the owners that inhibits him to take the dog pretty much wherever he wants to (indeed, its against the law to stop him), but the owners threatened to call the police after an argument ensued.

“I was made to feel like a piece of dirt. They told me I couldn’t come in because it was against their religious beliefs to have a dog in the restaurant”

Apparently, the guy is considering suing the establishment.. I move that I think is a little harsh. It could be that they just didn’t understand that it is against the law to stop him and his dog.

Sorry to bring about the gloom in this season, but there is nothing worse than going to a club/bar/restaurant/pub and being forced to listen to bass hunter’s god awful rendition of Jingle Bells. I honestly don’t know how the guy sleeps at night. He is single handedly ruining all types of music for everyone, everywhere by releasing that piece of crap.

Its not just him neither. Looking over this years crap fest of yule-tide songs reveals another Jingle Bells rendition by Girls Aloud (that sucks), Some god awful crap by the Wombats,an overly competitive Ashanti and Beyonce singing Silent night. Oh, then there is Coldplay, Jason Mraz, Cascada and a million other hopefuls.

I’d rather die than listen White Christmas by Michael Bublé again.

SO I made a post a while back about a local pub on the Rainow road that won some awards for being the best pub food in the North West. Although I commented that the food was probably great, I had never actually eaten there. I received this yesterday night, as I finally bit the bullet and went for a meal.

The location is good enough, the pub sits on the Rainow road, right at the top of the hill, so it looks out over most of Manchester. Its a little far out, but I guess that’s a good thing (its a really nice view)

The food is pretty much perfect there. I went for the soup of the day and the rump steak with pepper sauce. I have never tasted steak like it. Its all sourced locally and is cooked to perfection.

One thing to watch for is the door on the way in. Its a little awkward (we thought for a while it was closed and could not get in) Its also pretty expensive. We ended up paying about £16 a steak. Worth it though.

I tried some Asda smart price beer the other week. Turns out this stuff is a hotbed of controversy as it can pretty much allow you to get fairly drunk for under a pound. The stuff sells for about 22p each can and is only available in packs of over 4.

There has to be a tastier way to drink yourself into a stuper.. The stuff tastes really rough. If you manage to drink all 4 cans you’re a better man than I am. Turns out this stuff sells for less (per can) than Coke and even water.

I can’t imagine that they are getting much profit on these. Just relying on drunks buying other munchies to go with their nasty tasting cat urine.

“This sends entirely the wrong message to the young drinkers we are trying to steer away from alcohol abuse.”

’nuff said I think.

Nope, me neither. I know the percentage drop is minimal compared to the duty on alcohol we pay here, but it seems that nobody in the alcohol business has payed any attention at all to the reduction in VAT. I looked into it a bit, and alcohol is definitely subject to VAT (along with duty tax) so why haven’t they reduced prices?

I would expect this kind of thing from the smalller pubs that are falling on hard times, after all it must cost a bit to get signs changed, till prices updated, etc. But big companies like Wetherspoons should have sorted this out ages ago.

I keep stumbling across some really great bottle openers available on the Internet. Any of them would make a pretty fun stocking fillers for the family drunk or even a fun option for the office secret Santa.

I don’t know why, but I thought I would start with the most useless of them all. I’m guessing it would be pretty useless as a fork.. Never the less, its a fun idea.

This one is pretty cleverly disguised. The end of the key is used to pry the bottle open. A good present for someone with a big bunch of keys.

I have seen a few variations of this one. This thumb ring doubles up as a bottle opener. Very handy for the true drunk.

A bottle opener make for the most amazing business card. You can actually ask to get your name and address printed on these.

I don’t really have any more details on this one.. It looks pretty fun though

I honestly think every shoe should have one of these. As long as they don’t get too grimey.

Africans apparently often use a bit of wood with a nail in it. I just love the simplicity of it.

So its now the time of year that office christmas parties are starting to appear. Given the current economic climate, a lot of us will either be too scrooge to go to an Xmas party or wanting to drink away their various money troubles. Here are some tips to survive the inevitable office Christmas party:

Control the alcohol intake. This sounds an obvious one, but it really is a bad idea to drink yourself into a coma when you are surrounded by your respected colleges and your boss.We have all heard the stories about the guy that [insert drunken act here] to [insert bosses name] and ended up getting their asses sacked on Monday morning. Don’t be that guy.

Don’t be tempted to photocopy your ass. Yup, there are horror stories littering the web about various appendiges getting trapped in photocopiers after the glass on the top has shattered. Its not fun to have to call an ambulance to extract you and stitch you back up.

Everybody has a Camera. Remember that absolutely everyone has a camera on their phone, in their purse, in their hands. If you do decide to do something stupid, expect it to be uploaded to the Intranet/shared drive (and possibly the Internet) on Monday morning. Big mistake.

Don’t discuss work all night. You can expect to be left in the corner on your own if all you do is talk about sales figures or how the latest product is doing. Your colleges are all there to have fun, so drop the work thing and talk about the weather or something.