I want to be entertained

Its becoming increasingly obvious that more needs to be done to help out the great brittish pub. With over a third of the price of every beer going streight to the tax man, brittish pubs are now closing at the rate of 6 per week thoughout the UK. These aren’t your usual start up business pub either.. these are the sort of pubs that have litterally been serving the community for hundreds of years.

With this in mind, MPs have begun to listen to the pub landlords with some even creating guides to saving your local pub from closure by giving business and helping out. Its a good cause as we are in a very real danger of loosing the very part of this contry that makes us brittish.

Its fair enough having carpets in a pub.. I think it makes a place seem a little more homely and more traditional.

But bars and clubs are traditionally places where a lot of alcohol gets consumed more or less every week.. When you factor in the various bodily fluids that get expelled when people over drink and the amount of spilt drinks that occur on a nightly basis in every club in Britain, there is no way that a modern club should have carpet fitted anywhere. If you find that a carpet is needed to match up with the theme in your club, then change the theme or get ready to invest some serious money in carpet cleaners london.

I can’t stand paying several poinds toget into a club or bar here in Manchester and have to deal with some manky old sticky carpet that has had 2 generations of people spilling every drink from vodka red bulls to gin and tonic. Honestly, how hard is it to fit a floor that you can mop down every once in a while and keep at at fairly decent state of repair. I’m not after hospital clear or anything, just a bit of a clean would be nice.

So without further ado, I’m naming and shaming some of the worst bar and club floors I have seen:

Zanzibar, Stafford: I once lost a shoe in here because the sole literally stuck to the floor so well that the laces came undone. disgusting.
5th Avenue, Manchester: This place has had so much student vomit on it you can almost smell the double vodka red bull before you go in.
The Ritz, Manchester: I think the carpets in there are as old as the building. There are areas in there where there is more chewing gum on the floor than there is carpet.

Know any sticky floored clubs or bars you wish to name and shame?

I stumbled across a useful image the other day showing a tree of all the different types of beer. Its pretty interesting and goes into a pretty useful hierarchy:

• Ale
  • Barley Wine
  • Belgian Ale
    • Abbey
    • Amber
    • Blond
    • Dubbel
    • Flemish Red
    • Quadrupel
    • Trappist
    • Tripel
  • Brown Ale
  • Dark Ale
    • Stout
      • Chocolate
      • Coffee
      • Dry Stout
      • Imperial
      • Milk
      • Oatmeal
      • Oyster
    • Porter
  • Kolsch
  • Mild
  • Pale Ale
    • Altbier
    • American
    • English Bitter
    • I.P.A.
    • Saison
    • Scotch Ale
  • Wheat Beer
    • Berliner Weisse
    • Dunkel Wheat Beer
    • Heffeweizen
    • Kristallweizen
    • Weizenbock
    • White Beer
  • Old Ale
• Lager
  • Bock
    • Doppelbock
    • Eisbock
    • Maibock
    • Weizenbock
  • Dunkel Lager
  • Marzen
  • Pale Larger
    • Dortmunder
    • Dry Lager
    • Helles
    • Pilsner
    • Spezial
  • Schwarzbier
  • Vianna Lager
  • Kellerbier

Yup, there are some things that beer is extremly good at:

1. Strengthens Cordal Muscle (a heart muscle) The potassium, magnesium and phosphorus in beer help muscles such as the heart and could even reduce the risk of clots forming.
2. Cheers You up and reduces depression (in smaller amounts). Alkaloid isomorphine produces similar effects to morphine.
3. Withdraws Uric Stones. Beer actually helps with the decriminalization of uric stones.
4. Softens Skin and Enlarges Breasts. Also enlarges the stomach though
5. Strengthens Bones. Silicon, which is present in beer (in quite large quantities) helps bone growth and regeneration.
6. Improves mental activity. Vitamins B and P both aid mental activity.
7. Hastens Hair Growth. Vitamins B and P also help hair growth.
8. Good whilst suffering from Flu or a Cold. The bactericidal behavior of beer means it can help you get over the flu.
9. Male Potency. The Zinc in beer is good for male potency as it prevents swelling in the prostate.

Correct me if i’m way of base here, but drinking 13 beers in front of a judge to prove you are not a drunk is perhaps not such a great idea.

The mother of 3 children (1 six year old and 2 four year olds) was trying to convince the judge that she could handle larger amounts of alcohol whilst keeping the children in good health, but the slightly less than impressed judge ruled her unfit and took the kids into custody.

The mother had also turned to crime to support her alcohol (and other additions) abuse. So the children had been taken off her beforehand.. she was trying to win them back.

Welfare workers are currently looking for parents to adopt the children into a family.